Hi all. I try not to get too personal on this blog because you and I both know this is a craft blog, and although I dip here and there in various crafting venues and the spattering of family life, occasionally I love to hear what you all have to say about certain topics, because I really appreciate any knowledge you might have. I also hate to think that this might be too private and my son wouldn’t want me to write this post…but I would like to know if any of you parents have had a child with this problem and would love any advice you can give so I can help him.
My efforts to find much about this have been pretty fruitless, especially in tips for a child who wakes up with extreme panic/anxiety attacks at night. Even mentioning it to a doctor at his last visit didn’t do any good. I think I might need to make an appointment specifically for this with his normal pediatrician.
My eight year old has been having horrible panic attacks at night. He wakes up and is sweaty, heart racing, terrified, running around the house looking for something but when asked, he can’t tell us what it is. He is very hard to calm down, very shaky, and looks around as if the world might eat him up. It is pretty heartbreaking.
Last night was especially sad. Dillon and I had been in our room talking, and he had gone downstairs to find us. Thankfully I went downstairs to get a drink, and as I headed down, he completely caught me off guard coming up the stairs in the dark, a look of utter fear on his face, saying, “Will someone please help me?” It’s hard to watch.
Dillon and I remain very calm, give him lots of hugs and eventually calm him down. He goes back to bed some nights easily, and other nights he lies awake afraid to fall asleep, and even when not afraid, has a difficult time falling asleep. Last night he ended up in our bed, which pretty much never happens with him. He’d wake up occasionally gasping and say, “It’s that horrible feeling again!” He tells me it’s the worst feeling in the world.
We ask him if he remembers what happened the night before and most of the time he doesn’t, but he does remember the feeling. He has a hard time falling asleep most nights and I ask him if he is worried or scared about anything, and he says he isn’t, but that his body feels weird and he sometimes describes really odd feelings with his body—for example last night before he fell asleep he said when he laid down he felt like his head was being dunked under water.
Other than that, he is a happy kid! Yesterday we went swimming and relaxed and had a fun water fight and did sparklers before bed. Nothing stressful or out of the ordinary. He hasn’t been worried about anything during the day. He plays with friends fine, he laughs a lot, he plays with legos a ton (I mention that because it is fun and relaxing to him). I can’t think of what might be triggering these things. He reads before bed to try and get sleepy.
Anyways, hopefully someone has had experience with this. We’re doing the best we know how to at this point, but these panic attacks are becoming more frequent. Maybe the answer is that it’s night terrors and he’ll outgrow it? Maybe the answer is that we need to see his regular pediatrician (not the one we saw when I mentioned it). I know prayer never hurts :).
Normal posting will resume later this week. Thanks for understanding that the crafting community of blogging is helpful to this mama!
67 comments:
Night terrors are common but NOT as frequently as your son seems to have. A good doctor and/or counselor should really listen to you. At his age there may be a really scary experience that he's not even consciously aware of that may be troubling him. Can you use a photo to take pictures of when you wake him? Record heart rate and other signs. All of that would be a great benefit for getting him help for any underlying medical condition. (Mom who's been there.)
Just noticed a misplaced word. It should have read "camera phone" not photo.
Hi, I don't have experience with that specific issue but I do have a child with a developmental disability who has major sleep problems. I feel for you and your son. I think talking to your ped. is a good idea but maybe a neurologist also? It could be night terrors especially if he doesn't really remember them and isn't really "with it" when you go see him. Maybe the dunking sensation is that falling feeling we sometimes get btu he is more sensitive to it because of other issues? I hope your doctor listens well. Good Luck!
Oh, sad!! My oldest had night terrors, but not anything like that. Maybe a blessing and then a doctor? I hope he outgrows it/resolves it quickly!
I have some experience with this. They usually don't remember.
You need to be careful about your activities a couple of hours before bedtime. Be aware of what he is watching, listening to, reading etc. These things are planted in the subconscious. Then they are brought to the surface in deep sleep. Be serious about watching this for a couple of weeks. Make changes as you feel necessary. The trigger can be as simple as a commercial on TV. Our children find a lot of things terrifying. Good luck! My prayers are with you. By the way, he will grow out of this.
Hello! So sorry to hear you are going through this with your son. As a long time sufferer of anxiety, I can really empathize with your little guy! My advice would be to get him some help ASAP. Anxiety is one of those things that can quickly overtake a person's life if he/she experiences it long enough. I would recommend asking your pediatrician to refer you to a counselor who specializes in children with anxiety. Often counselors know just the right questions to ask, so perhaps he/she would be able to help your son put what he's experiencing into words. I will be thinking of your family and hoping that you are able to find some relief for your child!
My son has night terrors and from what I have read and how it was explained to me, it is usually after a day of a lot of activity and not a lot of downtime. Then when they go to bed, usually a couple hours in, they have a night terror- and they are trapped between two cycles of sleep (REM and Non-REM). My son never remembers it, even though the experience is often devastating for me. Sometimes he cries, sometimes he is angry- and sometimes he is scared. They say not to try and wake them - even if they seem "awake." My son seems awake during his, but has no memory of them the next day. My son does best with routines and when we break from his routine, even in more mild ways, we can end up with a night terror.
Does your son seem to remember these episodes? You might want to talk to your pediatrician and have the doctor recommend a specialist to help, or maybe the doctor can provide you with tools so you can all cope better and help you all feel empowered.
I feel your pain and understand how horrible and terrifying it is for you and your family. I hope that you get answers that are helpful and that it is a phase that passes soon.
oh Christie, I'm so sorry. I don't have any experience with this kind of stuff, but it sounds scary. wish I could help.
Try some Rescue Remedy http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=rescue+remedy
I have the regular drops that you can use when you are stressed, overwhelmed or anxious. I also have the Sleep Spray. You are supposed to be able to spray it in your mouth if you wake up in the middle of the night and have trouble getting back to sleep but I just give it a spray or two before I go to bed.
Would you consider seeing a naturopath? Night terrors can be related to food allergies or sensitivities. My third daughter has struggled with sleep issues and since we've been watching her food carefully (being especially aware of food dyes) she's been better...Although there was a lot of prayer that went along with her return to sleep health as well.
I hope you can find some answers. I really urge you to look into natural healing solutions. A google search for night terrors and food allergies turns up quite a few results.
Saying a prayer for your guy, and for you and your husband, during this stressful time.
It could be a sleep apnea. I know when i was younger i would have terrors like that or feel as if something was pushing me down and i couldnt move. I didnt experience it as freq as ur son is and unfortunately i still have it at times. The only thing i found to help was to try and calm down when i feel the panic rising but thats hard to tell a kid that. :(
I lke your idea of prayer not hurting. There may be physical reasons for those night terrors, and there may be spiritual ones. I heard a well-known speaker once say that kids are able to accept spiritual things more than adults, who have talked themselves into be spiritually cynical. Here is a link to a song that is a wonderful bedtime blessing/prayer. I hope you find some relief - for the sake of everyone in the house.
Have you noticed any consistency in when it occurs at night (how many hours after he falls asleep, or a certain time every night)? The topic of night terrors was covered on an episode of The Doctors, and it was recommended to fully wake the child up about 15 minutes before you anticipate them having an episode...like take them to the bathroom, have a short conversation with them, maybe pray with your son. Then have him go back to sleep. The idea was that if you do this for about a week, it will reset whatever is creating the issue and shouldn't happen anymore. This was just one recommendation on the show to a family who had a daughter with similar symptoms. Obviously, any pediatrician should give you the attention you need to work through this. When my sister was little she had night terrors and it was so troubling for my parents. She did grow out of it eventually, but my mom said that she certainly would have tried this as an option if she had known then. And, if it's a recurring bad dream that your son can't remember, sometimes waking him up during the dream can help him think about what was going on and you can help him with an alternate ending so that it's not scary anymore.
I don't have experience with this personally. My mother has had these night terrors all her life, so I wouldn't automatically assume that your son will grow out of it, unfortunately. My mother does remember hers though. I would echo others. Definitely a blessing for your son and for yourself to know how best to help him. Talk to your pediatrician about seeing specialists. I'll be praying for your family; I can't imagine how heartbreaking that is for you and your husband to feel so helpless. Hugs from afar.
It could be a sleeping disorder. My dad has sleep apnea and just recently got diagnosed. My Mom told me that he had always told her he would die in his sleep because he always felt like he was drowning. He now uses a CPAP and is feeling fine. Also, have you checked out Ashley @ Little Miss Momma blog. Her little boy would wake with terrors and they finally took him to a pediatric ENT and found out his adenoids and tonsils needed to come out. He is doing so much better now. I hope you find a solution. It is so terrifying and heartbreaking seeing our kids in pain. I hope you can find a solution!
I have had night terrors my whole life (I am now 27). I wouldn't say it is 'just' night terrors. The feeling you get before you fall asleep is terrorizing and now that I am older I have a hard time falling asleep because I get anxious of what the night holds. It is very scary and very real feeling until you are fully awake.. and now that I am older I can remember things vividly.
I will keep you and your family in my prayers. I wouldn't wish this on anyone, sleep is precious.
I was going to suggest Rescue Remedy as well.
I dont have night terrors but i have anxiety attacks. Anxiety and panic are sort of related, so Rescue Remedy might help.
i have hear night terrors are hard to deal with. I would suggest seeing an specialist for this.
Sending our prayers your way.
oh my... so sorry that your little guy is going through this. Sounds like you need to speek to his dr. My daughter outgrew her night terrors. She was also afraid of thunder/lighting and fireworks. We made of habbit of having tea time at night. Instead of lipton tea we would have chamomile which has a calming effect. My daughter never wet the bed so it was not an issue. There are chamomile capsules in pill form. My daughter also enjoyed sounds of nature at night, tree frogs, dolphins in the ocean.. it was very soothing. Also, make sure the temperature in his room isn't too warm or too cold. It should feel just right. :) Good luck and keep us posted! This too shall pass! <3
Hey Christie! Like some of the ladies, anxiety is an unwelcome friend to me too. I reached out during college for help with this and now I can pretty much handle it myself. Ask your son if he wants help with it and then reach out to either a friend who also struggles but has developed some coping tools or a therapist or certified counsellor. If he can handle his anxiety himself, his confidence will build and there won't be a need to be afraid of going to bed. Momma, I know your heart is hurting but I'm proud of you for reaching out for help!
My oldest has sleep trouble, including sleep walking, talking in her sleep, terrors and restless leg syndrome. She's eight and we've been through two sleep studies already. This was in conjunction with us researching her ADHD treatment. We have eliminated processed food (dyes, etc) and had her bloodwork done. She has low ferrarin (a specific type of iron), which can be associated with sleep issues. Our regiment now is melatonin, iron drops and a regular bedtime with "wind down" time. I also put a bar of regular soap between her sheets! She seems to do much better now. She still has the occasional issues, but not nearly as commo. S they used to be. I hope you find some answers soon. We had lots of prayers, lots of discussions with our pediatrician and lots of love. Best of luck to you!
It's always hard when it is a child who is having issues. :(
My son has panic attacks and major anxiety but during the day. The simplest things can set him off. He just turned 10. It started when he was 6. It is heartbreaking.
Recently he also became terrified at night as well. He asks to sleep with me almost everynight. We've put more light in his room and sometimes sit with him but he is just terrified.
Nothing is there to scare him and he doesn't watch TV before bed. He also has ADHD.
We've started cutting down on his sugar and watching what he eats; I've added a desk lamp with a timer in his room so it is really bright. Pushing fluids too.
It's hard to figure out what helps and I wish you good luck!
Night terrors can be so frightening. My second daughter has them frequently. She rarely remembers anything and we just hold her and put her favorite comfort items around her. We often put her in our bed because it seems to calm her quickly (she's almost 6). She's had these since she was 3. Probably 4 or 5 nights a week she has them and wakes 2-3 times on those nights.
We try to limit anything scary she might watch and basically hope she grows out of it. I'm not sure if/when she will. Hang in there. We do pray with her sometimes but she's usually not really "with us" you know? She's in her own world and often can't answer or respond. It's freaky for sure. Hang in there!!
If you find a good answer please let me know =)
I agree with "wingin' it" - it sounds like it could be a spiritual experience, and not a good one! Help your son to have the words to say, telling fears/bad dreams to go away. Something like "Go away - I belong to Jesus" or quoting a Bible verse out loud "When I am afraid, I will trust in you [God]..." (Psalm 56:3-4)
I also agree that a counselor could be helpful, but would ask for a recommendation from you church leaders.
Keep praying, and pray with your son!
I would absolutely take him to a neurologist, ent, chiropractor, whatever you feel is right. You are his mom and know him head to toe, inside and out. Better than anybody here on this earth. You are his voice and advocate when no one else can be. Never back down from something you know in your heart to be true. I say this because it will seem like you are the only one who sees the problem and you will have to fight to have your voice heard. But in my own experience, moms are always right when they feel something is wrong.Stay strong.
Whilst we haven't experienced exactly as you describe, we've had trouble with anxiety and falling asleep in our 8 yo ds. A friend sent a children's meditation cd and we play this every night when he goes to bed, it has helped alot. I would always recommend seeing your gp, but you've already done that, so I'd go natural remedies as well. I hope you find the answer there is nothing worse that seeing your child distressed and unable to find a fix quickly.
Night fears are dreadful, I suffered when I was a child and can remember that feeling of waking up and not knowing what was going on but being so scared. My advice would be to go see your ped. especially to rule out any physical problem, and then if there isn't any worries there to try a counsellor who specialises in children. Not everyone grows out of these kinds of things and I'm sure you realise that it is better to take action now than leave it for a year or two. Hope thing settle down for you soon.
Could it be sleep apnea? That's where you actually stop breathing in your sleep and wake up gasping for air. It can take quite a while to calm down after waking like that. I I would ask to be referred to a sleep specialist to make sure it's not that.
I've been reading all the comments and you have wonderful friends!
Indeed, if you walk into the sleep apnea clinic here on any Wednesday it will be full of children. Many of them just have enlarged tonsils and are referred to the ENT clinic.
Prayers and blessings calmed my little and not so little ones for years but I made sure there was no additional physical cause.
I strongly agree with one of the other comments. We can and will encourage and support you. YOU are the parents and it is YOUR right and privilege to know where to go for YOUR son. We have all had different experiences but the Lord is mindful of YOU and knows exactly what YOUR son needs. He has entrusted him into your care and He will guide you as you seek for understanding and help. Just listen and follow the promptings of the Spirit. It may take some time, it may involve looking at several angles but in the end you will be able to help your son and someday someone will need advice and encouragement from your knowledge and experiences. God bless you.
I babysat for a child that had night terrors that sound similar to this. The parents were told that when she woke up screaming in her bed, to just watch from the door - don't try to wake her up or calm her... it was terrifying to watch, but it passed and the they said the terrors were shorter when they just watched as opposed to trying to wake/calm her.
i haven't read all the comments, so maybe this has been suggested...but i would record them so when you go to the pediatrician, or counselor, or whoever, they can see exactly what is taking place? My son had night terrors, but when he was much younger and he pretty much grew out of them. he is now 8 and occasionally has them, but nothing too frequent or troubling. I hope you are able to find a solution for your son! it's hard as a parent to not be able to fix something that's bothering your child.
I had a friend whose son had night terrors regularly, and she started using whichever doTerra oil it is that helps with sleep, and she would put it on the back of his neck every night before bed, and he went from three to four terrors a week, to one every other month. She said it is worth every single penny it costs because of how well it has worked.
Another thing I have noticed Christian ask our boys when they are experiencing feelings they don't know how to explain: he asks them what color the feeling is. Then he asks them to describe the shape, the smell, the touch, etc to see how they can explain it using different senses, and then validates each of these things for them ("yes, red can feel like a scary color sometimes. What feels scary about it?").
Lastly, it sounds like he is experiencing some feelings that he really doesn't know how to work through. Therapy could help him work through these things. Best of luck to all of you!
hi - i am in ttl agreement with Robyn. My cousin had nearly this same challenge and by the time someone took it seriously she had the anxiety take on a huge part of her life. She had eegs and for a short period of time took some antisiezure meds. She was weaned off in a relatively short period of time BUT had the anxiety of dread the attacks would occur and needed follow up for that. It just is not worth waiting on. Do take notes to be able to show your dr. It helps them know that you are taking the issue quite serious.God bless you, hsb and son and the rest of the family
Um, I don't know exactly what kind of spiritual life you and your family have, but this is what I feel when I read your post. Many will think that I'm crazy but I've seen this before - it's horrifying, for you and your son.
I think that you need to pray with him before bed and then together slip a Bible under his pillow to sleep on. Have the elders of your church anoint him with oil and pray over him. I know that many others have suggested that it's anxiety. I don't. I think he's being oppressed by an evil spirit.
Coming from someone who had night terrors as a child and who has 2 children who had them, boy do I understand!! I haven't had a night terror since I was a child, but I can still drum up the mental vision that I would dream about...and if I let it, the feeling of terror will overwhelm me. I am 34 years old. When I was a child, I remember waking up in our living room with my parents. They tell me I would run down the stairs, run around our kitchen table...crying the whole way. They wouldn't be able to wake me up.
My 7 yr old son began having them around 18m old as well as my 4 yr old daughter. It lasted for about 2 years with them. Unfortunately they were so young they couldn't tell us much...like your son talks about the horrible feeling. My kids were too young so they would just cry uncontrollably...and we couldn't calm them. Unlike what I've read, we DID wake them up. For us, it was the only way they would calm down. It would happen about once a week. They did outgrow it and we just did our best to help them through it.
My 8 year old went through this a few years ago and it freaked me out...
I don't have any good advice and the pediatrician didn't help. But I'll tell you the changes we made. I don't know if it was the changes we made or if he out grew it but we made some changes around our house to make daily life as routine and as peaceful as possible...really regular meal times, going over what was going to happen that day, keeping the tv and music off or quiet as much as possible and giving him loads of one on one attention. Then we also started really monitoring his food intake...what he was eating, limiting his sugar, making him take his vitamins.
(You are probably thinking we should be doing that anyway...but sometimes things get stressful and we had just added another baby to the family and life wasn't "normal" to him then. I don't know if that triggered it, if what we did helped, or if he out grew it...but for what it is worth that is what we did.)
Best of luck...my heart goes out to you and your son...things like this are tough.
-liZ
My friend's daughter had night terrors. Her Dr. Told her to do a breathing treatment (through a nebulizer) every night before bed. The daughter immediately stopped having the terrors. After a few weeks of no problems, they stopped the treatment, the very first night she had a terror again. I'm not sure of the medical explaination for why this worked, but it did for them. (eventually they were able to stop the treatments with no problems.)
So sorry to hear this about your cutie. You wrote he felt like his head was dunked under water - for me this sounds like my son when he was younger. He often woke up, sweat, white face, heartrunning and so scary. We thought he had terrible dreams coz he wasn't able to describe what happened. One night it was so bad that he slept in our bed and suddenly he stopped breathing for a while - then woke up again with that feeling. We went to our Doctor, said maybe a kind of sleep apnoe - but also he said a sleep-laboratory would be too much for my little man in this age and we first should try to make his head higher if he lays down to sleep. Well, I put some pillows under his mattress that the head was much higher - and it really worked! He can breath easier and the apnoe still comes, but not often. We bought a bed where you can make the headframe higher and next month we have to let the Doc check his tonsils and nasal.
Hope your cutie will be better again!
Prayers from germany <3
When I was a child, I suffered from severe anxiety at bed time. Not night terrors, necessarily, though I did have some of those. What my experience was I would lay down in bed and then all of these thoughts would crash around. I would try to block everything out but I had this extreme sense of... guilt. That's the only word I could put that sounded remotely like what was going on in my chest and head. It was terrible and nervewracking and lasted a very long time. I think I was 9 by the time it went away. My parents didn't think doctors could do anything about it so we never went in to see them. However, I remember talking things out with my parents, when I could discern what I was feeling, helped immensely. I remember feeling that if I could just talk it all out things would (and did) feel much better. Still, I wish my parents would have tried to call someone or asked for more help. I think if I'd had that, things may have stopped sooner.
I'm not sure if this has helped you at all, but I figured maybe the thoughts of an "insider" may put you more at ease about whatever decision you make.
God bless you and your family and I hope these end soon for him.
I had night terrors as a child (aged 5-10). They occurred about once maybe twice a week. I would run around the house terrified and panicked. I can still remember the feeling I had and actually remember being up and running around. My parents would follow me around until I calmed down because trying to wake me didn't do any good. They said they would try to get me into the bathroom and have me go pee and it seemed to sort of wake me and they could get me back to sleep. They lasted between 5-20 mins and I even tried to leave the house and once attempted to jump from a second story window. They seemed to happen when I was really tired or ate too close to bed time. Two of my younger brothers had them as well as my 2 boys (not my girls for some reason) but not like I did. My 5 yr old son seems to come out of it if you can sit him on the toilet and try to get him to pee. Sometimes he goes and sometimes he doesn't but it does seem to calm him down. Not sure why. I can't really find a cause other than the ones my parents said caused mine. I know this didn't help much, but we did outgrow it eventually. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. :)
Jenn
The underwater feeling your son described sounds a lot like sleep paralysis (and also sleep apnea, like some people have said!), which isn't supposed to occur on a regular basis like that at all. And as someone who's suffered from anxiety and panic attacks, I really think having your regular pediatrician refer you and your son to a counselor that specializes in younger children (or even just panic/anxiety disorders in minors) would be beneficial, as well as having your pediatrician check his respiratory system. Kids are easily frightened and night terrors are surprisingly common in children, but it's never normal for one to experience this much anxiety and distress at night. I think everyone here is right, honestly, and by that I mean all their experiences are valid and this could be caused by a lot of different things. Some of my friends who experienced night terrors as children continued to have them and still do to this day, and some stopped because of therapy, and others just stopped out of the blue one day. So I think it's important to try a few different solutions, because what worked for one of us may not work for your son, or vice-versa. No matter what route you take, I really hope your son feels better and that this anxiety passes. Living with that as an adult is hard enough, and no child should ever have to feel like that.
I hope you find some answers. Wish I could help! I'll pray for him and you!
I have night terrors and sleepwalk in periods of high stress - always have. I have a very hazy memory of them in the morning - my husband however is quite upset by my nocturnal activities, I shout and occasionally lash out at him or generally just keep him from sleeping. Stress isn't always to do with terrible things, I have episodes when we are gearing up for a trip, having people to stay, sometimes simple things like getting a haircut can set it off too. Have you wormed your son? Could he have something like glandular fever? Those things can upset sleep patterns too and can be easier to fix ;) good luck with it all - I have two sleepwalkers and a kid with anxiety disorder, I guess I have to blame my genes!!!
I have nights like that but it's usually because of what I watched on TV. Like I have dreams I can't dial 911 and am being attacked but that's because I was watching Criminal Minds or CSI. You might want to keep an eye on what he's watching or reading.
I am so sorry to read this about your son. Honestly I can offer no advice. I can offer some empathy because I had panic attacks when I was a college student and my heart breaks for him because I know what those feel like.
All I can offer you are my prayers. I will pay for his peace and for them to go away and/or knowledge for you guys and his doctor(s).
My first thought is sleep terrors. I had a few cousins that dealt with it. I would find a specialist to take him too. Maybe your regular pediatrician can refer one?
Oh wow, I have no ideas on this one, but I will keep your family in my thoughts and prayers. I hope you can figure it out soon. Keep us posted!
I am so sorry you are going through this it has to be horrible. My suggestion is to have him checked to make sure itmisn't anything physical but at the same time you could try to sage the house. You can use a sage wand or in my case I use Francincense? That is what is used in Church also. I try to do it about once a month because I can tell that the feeling is lighter after I do this and my kids have even asked me to do it when they had a bad dream. I buy the incense sticks and put one in each room and close doors and windows. After they have burned down I open everything up and say a prayer in each room. The problem with small kids is that they are able to see things that as a grown up bound to reality can't it is scary when they tell you they are afraid of something you can't see. Prayer helps immensly and saying it out loud also helps a lot. Going to the Dr. Might help you but this is something you can do anyway. Good Luck and I hope your little boy feels better soon.
Julia
I had night terrors all the time when I was younger, almost exactly like what your son is experiencing. I freaked out a few babysitters, who would not agree to ever babysit again. It wasn't until my mom realized they were heat induced that they stopped. Meaning: In the summer time we were always trying to save money on our electric bill and so she shut off the air conditioning pretty early in the evening. The house was pretty warm (though tolerable) when we went to bed. When she began letting the air run until we had already gone to bed creating a cooler sleeping environment, the terrors stopped. Obviously the problem could be triggered by something else in your son's case, but it's worth a try if you are seeing it happen more and more in the summer (especially with how hot it's been). Even as an adult I have some crazy sleep episodes when the house gets too hot at night.
It seems like you are getting a lot of responses. I heard once that you should not let them fall into a DEEP sleep. I heard of a woman who would let her son fall asleep and then would russle him up, not enough to wake him up but enough to get him russled. It would snap him out of falling to deep and then he would be fine the rest of the night.
My husbands niece would get like this too, when she was dehydrated.
It sounds very much like night terrors, I would experience them as a child and I wouldn't really be that lucid or remember what happened to me, but I woke up knowing I had a bad night. My mum would get a cold flannel before I went to bed and gently cool my face down and my wrists and legs.. she would leave the saftey windows so cold air could flow in. She would also gently massage my arms to send me to sleep. It would really calm me down, and in time I grew out of it.
Falling into a soothing sleep really really helps, especially if he knows that you are calm and close by.
http://web4health.info/en/answers/anx-night-terror.htm
Read that for some good information! Hope he falls into a nice dreamy sleep soon!
It seems to me like you have three options:
1. Medical - get him checked out by his regular doctor and ask his/her advice.
2. Alternative medicine - see ideas in comments above!
3. Spiritual - again, see ideas above!
It may be night terrors, but it may be linked to anxiety. My son has had night terrors, but not as frequent as your son and on the whole he is growing out of them (he is now 10). But I suspect my son has OCD, and I feel very worried about him. I personally have chosen option 1, the medical route, as this is what I am most comfortable with, but you have to choose what works for your family.
And good for you to talk to him about it. I know that has helped a lot with my son and OCD. He said 'Oh, I am not the only one! I thought it was just me.' Heartbreaking words, but talking about it helps.
Good luck with this. I know it is worrying, and I sympathise with your worries.
Someone mentioned food allergies. I wonder if he has a gluten allergy? I have a number of friends with children who cannot process gluten and those children respond with some of the same symptoms when they get gluten in their system.
My sisters and my daughter all went through a phase of night terrors very similar to what you describe (none of them had any feelings of or obvious underlying anxiety during waking hours, didn't usually remember the episodes during the day, and were very difficult to wake during the episodes.) With all three cases, taking them to the bathroom was the solution! Once they had gone to the bathroom, their bodies visibly relaxed and they were able to be settled calmly back into bed for the night. Each child only had the night terrors for a few months (though they did come and go periodically over a year with one sister.) Hope it can help you too, and that it is this simple phase and not something more serious!
Good luck,
Lauren
lmhr515 (at) yahoo *dot* com
In response to SUNNYSEWING and to you I agree with others that it could be food allergies:( I am so sorry you are experiencing this! I haven't had this exact experience but have had lots of anxiety and depression and 4 yrs ago I couldn't take it anymore. Meds didn't work for me and I finally went to a Hollistic or whole body chiropractor and have since found out I have many food allergies - gluten, oats, corn and fruit - sugar doesn't help anything either;) But that's the hardest one for me to quit. It's amazing how much better I feel and rarely ever have anxiety unless I eat one these things I shouldn't. You would be shocked and amazed as I was/am I'm sure if you started reading and learning what is being done with and to our food here in America. A sad sad situation for sure. I am your average ordinary wife and mom of 4 - not any kind of zealot at all - but as the months and years go on and the more I learn the more I try to do cleaner - organic eating for myself and family. It's very hard and expensive but we can only do what we can do to help ourselves. Baby steps. I hope and pray your precious son gets help soon. What a terrible, terrible thing for a sweet little innocent 8 yr old. I hope you find a wonderful dr as I have that you love and will help you. I hope and pray you have success for this sweet little guy!
You've had so many comments and suggestions here already that I'll just keep this brief: I had night terrors preclude being diagnosed with type 1 diabetes. After treatment began, the terrors slowed down and eventually stopped. So, in my case, night terrors were related to a physical ailment. I hope for a quick resolution to your son's night terrors. Hang in there.
I read the comments above and feel that I have a suggestion or two that have not already been mentioned. Especially with panic attacks, sometimes there are no external triggers. The best thing I can suggest would be to keep a relaxed environment (make sure it's a little on the cold side, create a playlist or cd of music that relaxes him and possibly keep it playing through the night) while he's asleep. Talk to him about what you have set up for him and it may help him feel more comfortable and less afraid of going to sleep. I wish you, your son, and your family luck.
This sounds like a classic case of sleep apenia. It is easily diagnosed with a sleep test which can be done at Primary's. He then will wear a oxygen mask at night. Definantly get him to a dr. to get him tested as this is a lifelong problem which can be easily fixed by wearing a mask at night. Good luck.
I had terrible nightmares as a child and my mother had my grandmother "exorcise" me by praying over me. Maybe you can get your preacher or priest (if you have one) to do something like that. But I also recommend talking with your pediatrician or child psychologist to help out, too. Go after all avenues! Good luck, I hope your son overcomes this soon, for his sake and yours.
Have had similar struggles with my daughter. She did have trouble with sleep apnea because of huge tonsils... things have improved since having them out. We also use essential oils and watch food with dyes and additives. Haven't had an episode in a long time.
Amazing how many kids experience anxiety and sleep problems, isn't it?! I definitely feel your pain. Our sons sound incredibly similar (8yo, happy-go-lucky during the day, love their legos, etc.).
Like so many other posters, I urge you to talk to your regular pediatrician. If s/he will not give you a referral to a pediatric anxiety specialist (therapist), then go to another doctor. We have learned invaluable skills from ours.
The first skill we learned was that music can be a really helpful tool for relaxation. We have a Vivaldi CD that our son has come to LOVE. I chose Vivaldi because its soothing, but upbeat. I play it as he falls asleep at night and turn it on right away when he wakes up in the middle of the night. It only took a few days for it to become a trigger for calming feelings for him.
Best of luck to you guys. I know how stressful this stuff is. Big hugs to you and your family.
Christie, just read your post and really felt for you and your family. My children have both suffered with night terrors and it is frightening as they seem awake and I've had a couple of upsetting moments when they've called out for me but when I've said "I'm here" they don't know me and try to crawl away. The only advice I can give is to stay calm during the episode and stay close and give calming reassurance. It does pass and generally my kids never remembered any of it the next morning. My two seem to have stopped having them for the moment for which I'm glad. Hang in there and it will hopefully get better. Sam x
Sleep Apnea maybe, that might be the feeling he's experiencing that's freaking him out. I hope you find out what it is soon. Poor guy, that's heartbreaking. I'll keep you guys in my prayers!
Our son also had issues with night terrors. It was really horrible and for 6 weeks straight he would have up to 3 episodes a night. He is younger than your son so I am not sure the info would be the same for his age group but we were told it's a developmental thing. They reach ages where one part of the brain may have matured faster than another and so some connections are not being properly made. Our Pedi told us to use melatonin to get him to relax at night and change the rhythm his body was getting into (of waking so often). Within a week of starting the melatonin we saw a marked difference in his sleep patterns and behavior. He would still have them a few times a week, but not several every night. After a couple of months we stopped seeing the behavior all together. We no longer use the melatonin (we stopped when we really started seeing a change) and he has been doing really well with his sleeping. Our pedi also suggested behavioral therapy to help him cope with situations that may cause him undue stress, but we ended up not going since he started improving so much.
Overall he is a very anxious kid...it's just his personality. We try to keep things consistent for him, but try to stretch him here and there!
Best of luck! I know it's a terrible and helpless feeling.
My son used to have night terrors too from about 1 and a half until about 11 years...thankfully they grow out of it. What I've saw was that it usually happened when he had a very busy day. His night terrors usually happened before I went to sleep so I learned to listen for it, the sooner I could get to him once it started, and started talking in soothing tones and rubbing his arms and face, the quicker I could get him to calm down. He used to make this funny sound - almost like struggling for a breath - and I used to run and start rubbing his face and then it was over just like that.
I took him to many doctors and nobody could help him - quite frankly I got the impression they either did not believe me or did not know what to tell me.
Luckily my son never remembered it. It was always an issue when he went for sleepovers - I always had to explain to the other parents as I never knew when it was going to happen - I remember once he went for a party sleepover and they slept outside in tents - the next day he told me he don't know what happened but he woke up in the child's bed in the house LOL.
Know that it passes - usually just after 10 years old - (I got this from info I got on the internet - and it turned out true in my son's case).
My prayers are with you and your family.
Not sure how old your son is...but we experienced a rough time during my sons 6th year. This book was encouraging..because it turns out some years the body is more overloaded developing and the child will have more tensional outlets. My son developed some noticeable motor tics. He never verbalized being stressed, though. Thankfully they faded. I think many things are development issues...like a growth spurt. Perhaps switch to a good vitamin. We used Kids Calm. It has good magnesium and fish oil. Hope things have settled down for your little guy.
Not sure how old your son is...but we experienced a rough time during my sons 6th year. This book was encouraging..because it turns out some years the body is more overloaded developing and the child will have more tensional outlets. My son developed some noticeable motor tics. He never verbalized being stressed, though. Thankfully they faded. I think many things are development issues...like a growth spurt. Perhaps switch to a good vitamin. We used Kids Calm. It has good magnesium and fish oil. Hope things have settled down for your little guy.
My son had night terrors from an early age, frequently. I felt helpless and had a doctor tell me he was too young to be having them. After lots of research, I found a combination of approaches worked for us.
Here's what we did: at age 5 we started him on melatonin to help ease him into sleep (he doesn't need it anymore). We frequently talk about his stress points, and that it's okay to make mistakes. I read "The Highly Sensitive Child" and used a a lot of the tecniques in it.
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